Evolution

No, not that kind. I'm not going to get into natural selection or anything like that. I want to talk about evolution of one's views.

My mother had a terrible marriage. As a child and teenager, I was convinced (because she said so) that everything that went wrong in her marriage was my father's fault. As the years went by and I began to see my parents with more experienced eyes, I realized that there were occasionally some extenuating circumstances and that my father wasn't the sole person at fault for everything that happened. I doubt I'm the only child of divorced parents to have eventually come to that realization.

As a teenager, I often heard from my mother that women were naturally better than men. I protested, but she insisted that it was so. Then my mother, who began practicing family law in her 60s (she spent many years fighting in court with my dad, so it was a natural choice of legal field), changed her mind. She says that in working with broken families, she saw just as many "bad" women as "bad" men and is now sorry for all those years she badmouthed men.

I worked one summer in Germany for a woman whose father had begun to exercise faith and practice his Catholic religion in his old age. She seemed rather disdainful of his elderly religiosity. I wonder, though, if she will follow in his footsteps when she grows older herself.

Part of going through life is learning new facts and experiencing new emotions and feelings, at least for anyone who pays attention. A result of this learning is sometimes a change of stance on bigger issues such as religiosity and convictions about specific political issues. It's normal and healthy to occasionally change one's mind when there is a good reason for it.

In a book club group a while back, we were discussing how Mitt Romney has been negatively labelled as a "flip-flopper" for changing his views. I can understand disagreeing with his current views, but to dismiss him outright as a dishonest person for changing a few convictions worries me. Do we really want a president who will never change his mind about something? Who doesn't let newly-discovered facts alter his opinions? I don't think most Americans want that. (Not that I'm promoting Romney--he's just an example here.)

How do I prepare my children to adjust opinions when appropriate without weakening their dedication to eternal principles like faith, hope, and charity? Something to mull over for a while. I'm guessing the answer has a lot to do with humility and never being complacent about one's knowledge level thus far in life.